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it's 730 in the morning and im feeling happy. oh yes finally, after the 2 stressful and freaky days. im pretty much back to my usual self. hoho. i woke up, realised that i was actually feeling happy and started jumping on my bed. and my sis was woken up by me and said "ehh why you jumping about for?". i gave her a spastic grin and skipped out of the room. hoho.
managed to sort out some thoughts yesterday. still left with some and they are the troublesome ones but managed to get them out of my head yesterday night before i slept and so far they havnt come back to haunt me. though ive got this feeling they will. eventually. i cannot evade it forever.
wished i had gone for shirim bbq yesterday. but then again... it would be bad so it's okay. was at home playing the guitar- pressing the strings super hard and trying to vent my frustration. my fingers had red marks on them because i was doing that for like a super long time but anyway, it did help. steel cuts your fingers. suddenly it seems like it was self-mutilation. but.. PEILING WILL NOT MUTILATE HERSELF. why? because my body is the temple of the Holy Spirit! okay so random.
my bro did a lot to help me yesterday. (: he came home in the afternoon and went "hey, since it's only gonna be the two of us in the evening, let's go to the beach" i went with him and had bonding time with him. heh. quite weird eh, but it was really good la, since he is seldom at home since he's so busy with debates and unicef and all his other commitments. he went to go get some drinks and food. so i walked along the beach and it really helped to calm me down. prayed and well, guess you can say talked to God. managed to sort out some of my thoughts. now ive got a place to go when i feel down- the beach! secluded part of the beach where i can find peace. but then again, i can always find peace in God! stayed there for a rather long time and the sunset was really pretty. thanks so much kor. really appreciated it and it really touched me. cause i know that you stayed up really late yesterday night working on your case because you spent such a long time with me at the beach. thanks so much.
oh and we took this picture of this pretty cool spider which is currently on my msn dp. God's creation is really wonderful. i marvel at it. how true is it that the heaven declares the works of the Lord. pretty spider.
i dont feel like blogging about swimcarn. because there's this huge urge to blog about camp!
i shall try to blog quickly just in case i start to think again.
GB MARCH RETREAT 2006
here are the more important events.
bus trip to port dickson.
sat with ruoting because yunxi and hannah werent there. was feeling hyper and sang christian children's songs. and we sang with christ in the vessel with a lot of words omitted! was super fun. hoho.
then when we were reaching immigration. i started singing boyband songs. like backstreetboys and nsync. and ruoting was i think traumatised. it's the boyband era again! hurhur like real.
later half of the journey we played mafia with zhener gracez yikai zoe jingy eunice shihui. the stories on how the person died was super amusing!
then we slept.
sleep at night.
roomed with ruoting on the first night. she slept in the same bed as me. >.< and took up 2/3 of the bed. tsk. 2nd and 3rd night with yunxi! hoho i tell you yunxi totally rocks as a roommate. basically because she likes to sleep late! on the 2nd night i drank hot choc and she drank milo and we slept at around 1230. on the 3rd night. wah i tell you that's the best! she drank milo and coffee. i drank hot choc and coffee. and we felt really high that night. and we didnt sleep until 3+. we made up really cool poems! and we've decided to have a poetry anthology and we will compile all our -ever so great- poems together. maybe my nice post shall contain our poems. i think we are budding poets. hurhur.
squad time.
i love levites! jumps around screaming. levites rock! levites is so obviously the squad. and the one and only squad for me! hoho. never regret joining levites. my redeemer lives! and cant take my Jesus away! fun fun and fun! songs with actions= yijibang! according to yunxi squad outing is on the 22 april for a concert. and... drum rolls.
underground ug.
was rather cool i guess. but i thought none of them looked scary except sheryl. but before that she was doing some weird laughter over the mike so it was like uhh, scary? no. and if i still had the impression that hil was dao, hoho, i would be freaked my her dao scary stare. heard so much about the torture chamber but i didnt get to go in. unfortunately. everytime we met a secret police i would be secretly thinking "pick me pick me!" because i mean hey, it's like ive heard so much about it and ive not gone in? it's quite sad right. stomps around. but it was well done la.
surprise item.
was pretty cool. but i didnt get to see the scary part because i was supposed to be kidnapped. eeyer. i want to hear hil sing the song again! the song is coolness! but i can only remember a few lines and remember the tune vaguely.
wargames.
it was fun! =) and i still cant believe that group 2 got first. it was so unexpected. and we beat them by quite a huge number of points. hoho. go group 2! and apparently hil didnt want to play because she wanted to bond with our group. lol! (:
group presentations.
lol. i am cheeky. and hannah's my girl. hil was francis and julie was hil's girl francesca however you spell it. was super lame la. mcdonalds im loving it vs kfc finger-licking good. and i thought it was good! since we didnt really have a real rehearsal and stuff. way to go! and je ne t'aime pas. HOW DO YOU SPELL THAT. but i still think taoyan sounds better. it sounds so much gayer. high voice+gay hand moves= taoyan beats je ne t'aime pas. but anyhow i think hil looked cool.
claudia was weird. like i love french ___ then i love frenching. lol!
zoe and her big round tummy. lol!
avril looked tootified and her spongebob voice. my goodness, it was so funny please.
zhener was super good! her ahboy thing. and yikai's aunty stuff. reminded me of my aunty, my mum's cousin. who likes to call me pui ling. like my goodness, what's her problem?! apparently pei is pui is some dialect. but honestly, IT SOUNDS DISGUSTING. im glad she isnt my mum's sister, i will just die. but anyway that's beside the point.
squish looked funny. when she squealed and jumped out. and hil looked jealous. tsk.
there's something strange in gb camp. who do you call. the pokers! memorised the line already.
had some other pretty gross skits which freaked me out.
group2.
julie- nice. sweet and a great group leader!
hil- funny. how could i ever think she was dao. whacks my head. pretty cool and super pro. im jealous. hoho. and enemies with the pacific coean and the atlantic ocean- the twinniebeanies! and fellow gangfighter.
alicia- in love with lee ryan. i dont think he's that hot what. nice and funny.
hannah- my girl. keep your hands off her eh. if not i will get my twin to go bash you up. oh yes hannah MUST MUST SHOW YOU OUR GANG FIGHT. it's like coolness please. xp you will love it. hoho.
sherlyn- quiet but i think she's sweet.
chinwei- i cant believe before that i typed cheenwei. sings weird songs.
gillian- my gen1bang1.
devotion.
devotion was really good and i learnt a lot. and it somehow hit the nail right on the head. and it made me think and think and think. and nearly drive myself crazy. but now im fine, and im stronger than yesterday! yikes, i dont like britney. mr marc really knows what he is talking about. although his voice is rather monotonic, his devotion is like woah. i know during the first devotion i was rather bored then he said something about God's will against my will. and i woke up and since then, devotion was something i looked forward to. and i guess some stuff he said clarified my thoughts and made me think about my spiritual walk with God and other stuff.
counsellingworkshop.
i counselled jan! hahah. situation: jan has a boyfriend called josh who is 20 years old and her parents disapprove and therefore she wants to run away from home. i didnt know what to say so i said something about me being like that once, where i had a boyfriend and then my parents disapproved then i talked to them and they approved or something like that. super funny. i dont know about others la. but for me. me knowing that i am "properly" counselling someone doesnt help me to counsel that person. it must be that whoever comes to me and says stuff and i just talk to them without knowing that hey im counselling them. get what i mean? okay maybe not.
bus trip back to singapore.
im so sorry yunxi. i just wasnt myself and i just kept thinking and thinking and thinking. and my laughter and smiles were fake. bleargh so sorry you had to travel back with me sitting beside you staring into space. just couldnt stop myself from thinking. must be quite tiring to sit beside someone who has no expression and looks as though she is going to commit suicide eh? and i reached home and survived the rest of the day with 3+ hours of sleep. quite proud of myself that i didnt faint from braindrain or something.
but during the bus trip there was this time when i felt better after singing as the deer and you are my all in all and you raise me up to myself. then i made up this poem about puddles and pacific ocean! it's titled puddles vs pacific ocean. x)
from the march retreat, i realised that i will miss the sec4s loads. ): like seriously. because they're so nice and fun and everything. didnt really miss the sec4s last year because they were rather distant and i didnt really know them well. but this year... ah!
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OH YES HOW COULD I FORGET ANOTHER IMPORTANT THING ABOUT GB RETREAT?
GANGFIGHT!
twinnie and i made our own gangfight. you must must see it if you havnt seen it! because it's really cool and we're having a preview and therefore it's free. when we make this whole play on gang fight [like we ever will. but hey, who knows!] we will charge 10bucks!
we have the cool one and the funny one. the funny one is really hilarious. and the cool one, well, is cool la!
gangfights are super fun. i dont know how it started but on the first day somehow we had this gangfight thing between me and elissa. but that's only a play you see. in real life, actually we are together, as long as one of us is in a gangfight, the other one will join in.
there was this time during dinner super fun. we had like a thousand and one gangfights. but first of all, i shall be anti-climatic and talk about my signlang. basically, i made up this signlang for the 26 letters of the alphabet which is honestly, much easier and much faster than the signlang we have now. once you master it, hoho, it's a breeze already. and i can sing the alphabet song with "potato"!
okay on to the gangfight during dinner. it's like either me or elissa or hil [and occasionally jan] will bang the table push back the chair and go "want to fight issit!" so fun! and then i pretended to splash water on someone.
im in love with gangfights. hoho.
oh and during the bus trip back. ruoting sat at my seat when i went down for i dont know what reason. and i was like "eh ruoting go back leh" then she looked at me and i went "what YOU WANT TO FIGHT ISSIT!" then she stood up and twinnie stood up too. and ruoting said to elissa" eh why you stand up. this one is none of your business." me: "we are together. i fight she fights." then ruoting and elissa stared at each other. couldnt take it anymore so i turned around and was like laughing, wasnt really true laughter but i was rather amused. and then elissa looked at ruoting and said in this cool voice "you want to take her seat right -ruoting nods- you. watch it." damn funny la! couldnt take it anymore.
GANGFIGHTS RULE.
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shall reply tags.
thanks brandon for calling and talking to me.
thanks jess for your cute sms.
thanks yunxi for reminding me about our poems.
thanks jon for helping me to finish up the camp proposal. so sorry yeah. (: just couldnt put my mind into it. shall go read the proposal later on.
thanks short for callng me a pig and typing my name there, showing me how much she longs to be like me.
thanks simin for asking.
thanks zach jere char for your sms.
and if you read this. thanks hil it was great talking to you. (:
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suffering from camp nostalgia.
bleargh i miss camp.
from seeing everyone for the whole day the past few days to not seeing anyone. sigh.
JUNE CAMP!
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1248pm.
just read finish jon's proposal and something struck me.
and now im thinking again.
damnit.
but at least im not thinking so much.
it better stay this way. im not gonna let myself be the way i was the past 2 days.
the guys are coming over later to discuss about camp.
shall go to haggen dazz later to grab some icecream.
hoho. lucky guys.
HAHA IM WATCHING SESAME STREET. AND I JUST SAW BIG BIRD.
i better stop thinking.
i had better stop thinking.
why am i in a thinking mood.
simple facts
peiling
30 march
christian
tnsrgs
simple words